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As a Police Officer a lot of things have happened to me that would be tough for a normal citizen to handle. But one night in particular turned out to be one that is a Police Officer's worst nightmare.

It was cold and I was dispatched to a call of a subject who had tried to stab his uncle with a knife. After arriving on scene it was determined that, we'll call him "Joe", had fled prior to me and my partners arrival. Joe had also reportedly been off of his mental illness medications for approximately two weeks.

We began a search of the area, which was out in the middle of the woods. We were flagged down by a couple who were camping and told that a subject had approached there camp and that he was acting 'crazy'. My partner and I approached and attempted to make contact with Joe. Joe was acting very erratic and not responding to our commands. Joe had his hands inside of his front sweatshirt pocket and would not remove them and we of course did not know where the knife was.

I brought my Police K-9 next to me and ordered Joe to take his hands out of his pockets or I would be forced to send my dog. Joe refused to comply with my orders several times. I sent my dog on an apprehension command and he grabbed Joe by the arm. Joe removed his hands from his pockets with knife in hand. Joe stated several times that he would kill my dog if I did not call him off. After my dog attempted to subdue Joe several times I called him back to me to keep him from getting hurt.

I removed my Taser and ordered Joe to drop the knife. Joe of course refused and I deployed my Taser at Joe. The Taser did not have any affect on Joe as he pulled the prongs from his sweatshirt and then began to run away with my partner and I in pursuit. During the foot pursuit my partner deployed his Taser at Joe two more times without affect either time.

Joe came to a large flat bed trailer and jumped up on top of it with his knife still in hand. My partner and I spent several minutes talking to Joe and trying to get him to drop the knife without success. Joe finally made his decision, put the knife above his head and lunged at me with it. In defense of myself I was forced to shoot Joe. Joe fell onto the trailer and my partner and I began CPR as we called for help. We continued CPR until a flightcare helicopter arrived on scene and pronounced Joe deceased.

This is something that I have had to live with for some time now and not a day goes by that I don't think about it. When it comes down to it though I went home to my wife and children that night.

I of course got a lot of criticism, good and bad, over the incident in the newspapers but of course I was there and they were not. I had a second to make a decision and in my opinion it was the right one, although tragic.

So when you read of an Officer Involved Shooting where the Officer was forced to take someone's life I just ask that you remember that you don't have all of the facts. No Officer ever wants to take the life of another human being. It is not something that is easy to live with, no matter how tough a guy you think you are.

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